Don’t be so easy to dismiss that over parenting happens and that you could be doing it in some areas. But just as you can be a workaholic and spend too much time working, so you can be a parent who is overly focused on your kids. But realize this is not about depriving them of the things they need or anything like that. Just remember that some day your child will have to deal with things in the world, and they need to have a foundation for doing it.
One classic example of being ‘too much’ of a parent is applying excessive pressure to excel in life. One way this occurs is by starting kids off too young on the road to academic excellence. What over-parenting adults do is rob their kids of a time when they need to be allowed to be what they are – little kids. On the other hand, it’s not likely that a neurotic parent will read an article like this and lighten up. So this is something that is food for thought, and hopefully it will reach out and touch some parents.
What you don’t want to do is never give your kids honest feedback, you must give them feedback or there is a real danger they will become spoiled brats without it.
It’s good when you teach your kids how to do things around the house, and that’s the best place for them to learn. Children must develop a sense of responsibility about tasks and that they should be expected to do some things. But this does not mean you give your kids impossible assignments or chores around the home.
The internet is often a cause for concern for most parents, especially when their children seem to know so much more about it than them. The temptation is too restrict and censor, however that is virtually impossible in the long run with so many devices and points of access. Get involved with your children is the key, encourage them to use the internet properly. One parent I know invested in a UK proxy service in order for their kids to watch the BBC online. This sort of proactive behaviour will encourage and stimulate positive behaviour which is better than trying to scare them off forbidden areas.
Various problems such as childhood obesity occur far more often with inactive children than those who are outside playing more, etc. Many things play a part in this overall condition with kids and one is protecting them too much out of fear. So one way or another you simply have to find some solution so your kids can be healthy. It’s better to let your kids learn how to play in a way that’s creative and loosely supervised and this includes plenty of time outdoors.
There are many forms and manifestations involved with the over parenting adults in the household. You cannot sit on the fence and be one way or the other, but you can find a good point that can work well. Be patient with yourself, and it’s a good idea to talk to someone if you feel that you need to do so. While it can be hard to break the habit of being too hard or over-protective, it’s something that you are encouraged to do.
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